Monday, September 28, 2009

weekend

Mom had a good weekend. On Saturday she went for a long walk - walked all around the building outside then sat at the front door area with friends for a bit before heading back home. That was a huge accomplishment for her. She also did some work going through some of her drawers. It is so nice to have her interested in doing things again.

On Sunday she was getting ready to go to a birthday brunch for some of her neighbors.

This week I am heading over on Tuesday with Katelyn for swimming and dinner together. ON Friday Jean is meeting us at Mom's for lunch, then I will take care of her shopping needs.

I think I will be heading over again on Saturday as Ruth is not going to be able to get there. Mia has a youth group activity in Boston and I offered to drive. Then I can be at Mom's until I have to drive them home.

Nancy can you go next weekend?
Anyone else planning any visits??

Saturday, September 26, 2009

a clean oven!

Spent the afternoon and evening with Mom yesterday. She had been to coffee and to mass, and wasn't totally exhausted, which is a very good thing. Other weeks just going to Mass would wipe her out.

One of the first things she did when I arrived was to show me how dirty her oven is and asked me if I thought the homemaker would clean it. I told her I had no idea, but that it might be a self cleaning oven. She said "I don't know what that means." So I emptied the oven, pushed a button and it proceeded to clean itself - She was so amazed and thrilled to be getting right at it.

We took in some of her plants - Does anyone want an orchid? She does not and was going to throw it away - I thought one of you might like to try one - It takes lots of patience, but they are beautiful.

Also Mom told me she got a silver bowl for woman of the year from somewhere. She does not know what she will do with it. Any interest?? She wants to get it polished up - Mia loves doing silver, so I'm sure she will clean it. Then she will put it somewhere in her place so that it can be seen!

So, okay, here's the thing. Now that she has more energy and is thinking clearer she is noticing all sorts of things around her place that she wants to get done!! And she is ready to get rid of things she does not want/need. As she goes through things I will let you know what she does not want anymore in case there is anything that means anything to any of you that you want. If not, we will just get rid of things. It will be totally up to here. I really don't care what she does or does not keep, it will be totally up to her. It is just so great that she is doing this now while she is able to think about what she wants to have around her.

She has a floor lamp on the porch that she doesn't think she wants. I think it matches one in her living room. Things like that I will probably get her to hold on to as they might be a set.

We have agreed to just go slowly so that we can both pace ourselves. We did one cabinet and found it had bugs in it, so that has prompted me to plan to get a step ladder in there and go through all the cabinets to make sure there is no more open food anywhere.

When I spoke with Mom this morning she told me she had already cleaned out one of the drawers and did not find any bugs in that one. Some of her food has been there probably since she arrived, so I will be checking the dates on it all.

We are starting to look closely at what is on bottom shelves as she has trouble getting down to them these days. I have already done the overhead ones as far as moving things she uses to closer to her reach. We are getting rid of her step stool as it just isn't safe. I am bringing the one I have for her to see, not that I want her climbing on anything, but we should have something safe there for others to be able to use.

Nancy and I spoke yesterday and she is going to get onto a regular schedule, as able , to see Mom.

Tried to get a calendar started - it is going to take a little longer for me to get the hang of it.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Friday am 9-25

Did not get a chance to post anything yet this week. Had to actually wash my kitchen floor and vacuum - Imagine having to clean my own house??

Tuesday Mom had a good day. She went down for coffee, and I arrived at lunchtime. She ate a great lunch. She so enjoys home cooked food. During my swim I was joined by Lil Kennedy - who also had 8 kids. She was telling me that she had recently decided not to cook any more. She just was tired of cooking and did not want to be bothered any more. That is where Mom is at. She just doesn't want to cook for herself. And you know what, I think she deserves it! Think of how many meals she has cooked in her probably 65+ years of having to do it for others.

Down the road Meals on Wheels would be a natural option, but I am not sure she would want to be a recipient. They can deliver a hot lunch and a cold supper once a day.
For now, me bringing meals, and having those of you who visit also prepare a meal is working just fine.

Mom decided her stove burner ring things needed to be cleaned. She was working on one when I arrived. She quickly decided that she would ask Holly , her home health aide to do it. They are in pretty tough shape, so I told her that you can now buy replacements. She immediately decided that that would be the route to go.

She also called during the week to tell me that she took a close look at her coffee pot and realized that she needs to replace it.

It is great that she is able to now notice things like that. It shows that she is taking an active interest in her surrounding. We are going to be going through cabinets, closets, drawers to see what she does/doesn't need - her decision to do this. I can make suggestions, but it is all up to her to decide what she does and doesn't want to do, and what she does and doesn't want around her.

Don't be surprised if she decides that there are certain things she can live without these days. She has had me prune down several of her plants and remove the trailers that were over the picture window. She is definitely paring down her life. This is a natural process of the aging process. Larraine said they also start withdrawing from people, so that is something we should be getting ready for.

Mom has told me on several occasions that she would like to be around to see what kind of adults all her grandkids and great grandkids become. As Mom's mom died in her 50's there is no reference to how long she could live. Grandpa was in his 80's when he died. But look at our Nangeroni aunts! Mom could be around to see Ryan getting ready to graduate from high school if she lives to 98!!

She wants to die living where she is, so she has started the process of preparing for the future by finally allowing the home health agency in the door. Baby steps ----- but forward ones, indeed.

Terri, the next time you are here be prepared to take home the amethyst. It has now been moved to Ruth's room. Mom is realizing that "things" which clutter her home need to be cleaned, and now that she is paying someone to clean, she wants there to be less to have to be done.

She had me take most of the framed pictures off the bookcase in the dining area and put the pictures in the collage and get rid of the frames. So there are frames also in Ruth's room for anyone who wants some.

We can have an ongoing collage in process for any new photos she gets. When putting together the photos for the new collage we realized that there were family members we had no photos for. As we had a full collage we decided to just finish it up and get it up for her and follow up later.
I don't remember all the photos I used, but I do know there were non of Nancy and Gordene, Derek and no current shots of Mary and Ray. Mom would probably love some updated photos from those of you who haven't sent any.

Tuesday night Larraine came for dinner with us. She brought Mom a loaf of cranberry walnut whole wheat bread which she loved. We froze individual slices for her to be able to enjoy later.
We all enjoyed our time together. Mom got to thank Larraine in person for getting us to up her water intake to 8 cups a day!! She joked about it but agreed that she could see that she is feeling better.

I have noticed a marked improvement in her moods and in her ability to be less confused.

There is a question of why she did not have a carotid ultrasound to see if there is any blockage. Of course, if she found out that there is blockage she would have to decide if she would want surgery. There is lots for Mom to figure out as far as what she wants for treatments, etc. in the future.

It is all a process, one which takes time to go through. We are all taking it one step at a time, as she dictates.

So Wednesday Mom went to have her hair done. She did not go down to coffee as she had slept in a little late - but was in good spirits.

Thursday she was preparing to go down for coffee after I spoke with her. She has decided to go with a purple whistling teapot I have that I don't use. She said she can put it in a cupboard when she is not using it if the color gets on her nerves!! And she is looking forward to the new range things that I have gotten for her.

I will be heading over for lunch and supper again today. Have picked fresh soybeans which we will steam and have with our meals. She loves the beans, but does not like the consistency of the pods at all - They are very furry!!! I had a thought come to mind - but it is definitely x-rated, and not one I am willing to put in writing!!! LOL!! Anyone who has eaten unshelled edamame will get it!!

Have a great weekend - Don't know if anyone is planning on being in Milton. Did I mention before that I am thinking of getting a google calendar set up so we can plug in our visits for all to see when she needs someone in??

Monday, September 21, 2009

Monday, 9-21

Ruth is visiting with Mom today, and heading to the U2 concert with the boys tonight! Brings me back many years ago when Derek went to his first U2 concert.

Just spoke with Mom and she has a cough and pain in rib when she coughs. I have suggested, rather strongly, that she get to the dr today - She thought it could wait til she goes next week. I reminded her that I need to take a strong position in matters of her health and well being and that she needs to nip whatever this is in the bud, so as to not end up with another issue, similar to her deafness.

She told me she would write down a note to have Ruth call me when she gets up and I did call Peter to let him know what was going on.

I am grateful that Mom does tell me when there are any changes in anything in her life, as this way we will be able to stay on tops of things.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

A glorious Sunday

It is such a beautiful, sunny fall day here in New England!!

As I have a touch of a bug which include dizziness i am staying away from Milton until it clears - Don't need Mom being any more dizzy than she already is. - Now that could be taken 2 ways!!

I have spoken with her twice today and she is in pretty good spirits. She so enjoyed her visit with Nancy and Gordene, and had a great time feasting on fresh fish they prepared.

So she is planning on taking a walk by herself today. I asked her to ask someone to go with her, but she refused to consider it. So I just asked her to stop at each bench and give herself rests along the way. We shall see how that went.

She has been enjoying movies lately. One of her favorites has become A Beautiful Life. The first time she watched it was a chore as she had to try to catch all the subtitiles. So she watched it again and got to see the storyline. So she watched it again and actually found herself loving it. So she watched it again!!!

Thanks Larraine for bringing that one over. She has been watching The Color Purple, which once I explained the characters and the storyline she was able to enjoy. She started Memoirs of a Geisha, but again had trouble following the storyline.

So if you bring her any movies, perhaps you could write a short bit on the movie so she will know what she is getting in to if it is a long movie. She really enjoys sinking herself into those long movies. When she gets confused with one she just sets it aside to ask me about the next time I am there.


Saturday, September 19, 2009

Fresh corn

Mom loves the new collage. We hung it right by the dining room table. She has all of you smiling out at her all at the same time!!!

So, I don't know if any of you know that I am not a big fan of Scrabble - too much thinking involved. Mom has been trying to get me to play with her, and finally got me to cave yesterday. As the game proceeded she kept telling me that she had never seen a board like the one we were facing before - We just couldn't find a way to get words south of the center! Long story short - We were playing while waiting for supper to cook, ........................I WON!!! I beat Mom!!!! She,a s always was very good natured about it.

I still prefer Triominos, a new game for her, but one which she is really enjoying. It doesn't take as long as Scrabble, so it is more my style.

I got her some new playing cards, and we played a regular rummy last week, which she remembered that she knew how to play once we got going.

While eating a fresh veggie saute, Mom recalled having corn as a child. Her mother grew it on the farm, they had hired hands in to help with the harvest. She could recall the corn being taken to a place where they would can it. Her fondest memory was of the pan of water her mother would get started on the stove, so that she could gather a bunch of cobs before they were taken to the cannery and then how great it tasted fresh off the stalks! She has been enjoying having a variety of fresh vegetables this summer from our garden.

She always mentions that she remembers the cherry tomatoes Nancy brought her. They were delicious and tasted different from the ones I have been growing. She didn't realize that there were different varieties for cherry tomatoes these days.

Mom is really looking forward to Nancy and Gordene coming today and preparing a meal. We left the Scrabble in its place of prominence on the table, so that it will be ready for her to do battle with them today!

I have left a journal on the table. I am working on it slowly to add in as much as I am able to .
After Stephen visited her last month she had asked me what he was studying. I told her film, and then she also remembered it. She asked me to write it down so that she could remember it. It gave me the idea that it would be helpful and fun for her, for her to be able to have her visits written down to be able to review them and remember all her visitors and the fun they have had.

In true Nangeroni spirit I started to date the pages of the visits she has been having recently, with who came, planning to get some info to get them filled in as I am able. I was thinking that it should be a chronological thing. Then it dawned on me that she can't remember what day it is, let alone the sequence of days, so the order of entries does not matter. As you visit Mom, if you feel inclined to write down anything of interest to her, prior visits, any memories, etc you want to share with her, please feel free to use it. I don't intend it to be a book of my writings.

I'm just planning on keeping it lighthearted. She is already enjoying it and thought it was a great idea. Mind you, she keeps reminding me that no all my ideas are great, like having to use soap to wash the dishes, having to give up her favorite coffee cup that has decades of filth in the bottom, which I can't reach as it is too small for my hand to get in to, getting a housekeeper in , eating enough protein, drinking enough water, etc, etc. etc!

But the collage and the journal she really likes.

If any of you are concerned about how i am caring for Mom just ask her - She will be honest and blunt about it. Oh, if any of you have complaints about anything I am dong with Mom, please feel free to take over for me!!!

Enough said.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Friday, 9-18

Writing from Mom's. Mom looks much better today. She got dressed up for Mass and even felt up to putting on makeup.

We had a nice lunch together, although I wish i could get her to stop feeling like she has to take care of me. She insisted on doing the dishes, but I only agreed if she would let me do the ones after supper. it is good to see her being pesty again. She seemed so defeated on Tuesday after getting home from the hospital.

We spoke about her hydration and now she is making sure she drinks her 8 cups a day. i brought her a 4 cup huge cup tat she only has to fill twice, so it will be easier for her to remember how much she has had.

During lunch she talked about all sorts of things with enthusiasm, which I hadn't see for a bit. I am going to tell on her because she keeps nagging me about doing things for her. She needs to know that it is about time she get waited on for a change!!

Derek loaded up a new computer for me with lots of photos, which we both enjoyed after lunch. She really enjoyed seeing the photos Paul sent of Paul Cifrino's funeral and Mary's first day of preschool as well as some that Derek had emailed
to me.

She wants to try using the email again, mainly so she can see photos you are all sending.

Her back is bothering her today, so she decided not to go down and watch me swim. She wants to cheer me on!!! I am taking advantage of the pool here to get some exercise on long days here.

Nancy has already given me some positive feedback on this blog. Thanks, Nancy.

I will be able to copy and paste any tidbits anyone wants me to add in here.

I will be finishing up the photo collage from the photos Mom had all over here. we had to declutter things for the new housekeeper.

Oh, yea, Mom's now got a housekeeper in every two weeks. That took a very long time to get her to agree to. Holly is very nice and seemed to take to Mom immediately. Holly especially loved her sense of humor. I hear banging in the kitchen - need to see what she is up to!!!


New blog

This is a new blog primarily for the purpose of journaling about Mom's daily life, from my perspective. It is not intended for her viewing, so that I don't have to worry about what is being written. I'm thinking of setting up something for anyone to add to for her to be able to follow.
We'll see how my time runs. Right now there are too few minutes on any given day for much and I thought this would save me from the emails I try to get out. I know some of you are interested in this and others not. Your choice.

The blue print is for you Mom, as it is your favorite color.

Today I am planning to go over for lunch and supper.

I now call Mom, at her request, first thing each morning, to help her get organized for each day.

If I have the time and inclination I might do some posts on prior days, but for now I will get at this when I am able. I'm thinking that while she is resting when I am with her is going to be a great time to do this. For now I am in Milton on Tuesday and Friday.

This morning Mom sounded very up. She was already getting breakfast ready and was preparing double what she has been normally eating. Usually she has just been having a piece of toast, and often without protein. This past week we discussed better nutrition and hydration. Yesterday she had 2 pieces of toast each with peanut butter and honey. Today she had already prepared the 2 pieces of toast and was adding cottage cheese and some fresh fruit salad that Katimay and I had brought for her.


She is planning to go to Mass at 10:00 then to have her day filled with whatever she wants to be doing with me there. We are working on a poster size collage of all the photos she had in the kitchen, to get them up on the wall for easier cleaning for her new Home Health Aide who started on Wednesday.

I am anticipating a good day as she was in such great spirits during our call.